Written by Maryann Penney
Tonight I found myself home with no husband or my kids. They stayed at the lake for an extra night. I came home to babysit my month old grandson. but being only a month old, he sleeps...alot.
So I found myself in my kitchen, surprise surprise.
If anyone knows me, I am my happiest self when I'm in the kitchen cooking and/or baking. However tonight I was not the happiest camper.
Why was I not happy? A Bagel....yup a Bagel made me cry
So I am assuming you all have heard about the 2 ingredient dough, if not google it.
I have made the dough many times before, until dairy became my nemesis and gluten was running behind it.
So I rolled up my sleeves, got out of my heels, haha, I rarely wear heels, and busted out my All purpose Gluten Free flour, my unsweetened plain coconut yogurt, baking powder and started "takin care of business"
As per the original recipe, it is even amounts of flour and plain unsweetened greek yogurt.
Now, knowing full well coconut yogurt is no where remotely close to greek yogurt, I decided 1 cup of flour, 3/4 cup yogurt.
The dough mixed up great! And I put them in the oven. I watched them with the light shining, dreaming of billowy (is that even a word?) chewy bagels, smothered with a dreamy cream cheese (vegan of course) and chowin down on one of those bad boys for my supper.
Remember I was basically here by myself, so I could eat what I want for supper.
As I watched patiently, I was wondering if my oven was actually working.
Ok I am not giving them enough time to actually start baking.
15 min later and I was still giving them enough time. Nothing. no rise from the baking powder, nothing. Nothing was happening.
Then I thought, ok they are gluten free and dairy free. So of course they will be a little different.
By this point in time I had five minutes of baking time left, my stomach was rolling like the thunder in that Garth Brooks song
The timer goes off and I take them out of the oven. Good God they look horrible. Here comes the glassy eyes. I blamed it on being hangry. Don't worry they will taste better and everything will be great.
NOT. They were like hockey pucks, white hockey pucks. Best part? When I "cracked" one open, the inside was raw. Yup....raw.
At this point,,, I cried. I was so hungry, it's 7:30pm and here I was sitting on my island, crying.
Not some little whimpering cry, this was big ugly sobs.
It lasted 20 min. Really Maryann? 20 minutes crying over a bagel. All I wanted to do was make one of those Betty Crocker mug cakes I had bought for the kids last month as a treat. I swear I could have made 6 mugs and ate every. single. one.
I reached for the tea towel, wiped my face off and threw those suckers in the garbage, made some gluten free pasta with a quick cashew "cheese" sauce and enjoyed every bit of it.
The moral of my story? Don't go too long between meals. Being hangry is not a good emotion, at all.
And you, bagel, I will be coming for you in the morning, And no it will NOT be like that 2 ingredient dough bagels, mine will be the best gluten free vegan bagels ever.
Certified Holistic Nutrition and Wellbeing Counselor